God never changes. Only my understanding of God may change over time. Thank you Lord for building me up again. Thank you for installing within me that boldness to persevere and reach out. That I can fully grasp again, that I am fully saved by grace through faith. Lord I cannot earn your love, but I do so want to help to advance your kingdom! The problem is was running in front of you, not behind you. I was trying to meet an expectation that was not yours, and so I grew more and more weary. What an experience. And Lord I thank you.
1Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ: 2By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God. 3And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; 4And patience, experience; and experience, hope: 5And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us. (Romans 5:1-4)
Lord today I was able to pray for people and tell them about your goodness again. I saw sad faces starting to smile, and two people telling me they had no more pain and the other that they felt very happy after prayer. I thank you Lord that I can not only bless them by telling them about you, but that you have also given me the means to bless them financially. I pray you will sustain this in my life. But if not, then I know even that will be a blessing!
Lord Jesus, thank you for doing a great work in me. Please have your way Lord, your way is good, my way is disappointing, too hard and tiring. Your yolk is light, and it is you who gives me rest.
Father in heaven, thank you for the revelation given to me via Scott Clarke, that the books written by Paul are for the body of Christ, Hebrews and onward is written for the Jews, to redeem them during the tribulation period. (Note to self, futher study….)
God is a good God. He created us with a free will. And we are free to choose. Good and Evil. How free would we be if every time we wanted to go against the nature of God, He would block us? He won’t. From the beginning, He never wanted us to have to face darkness. However, if He would not have given us the choice, the opportunity to face it, we would not have been created in His likeness.
27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. Genesis 1:27
Our first choice was given to us in the Garden of Eden. We chose to know about good and evil. Did God know we would eat of the tree of good and evil against His command? I believe so. And I believe He had His redemptive plan ready all along. By eating of the fruit of that tree we digested darkness. No longer were we beings of light. Our reality changed. Paradise (that which is void of evil) could no longer be our home as we had brought evil into our reality, could there be darkness in paradise? So we were removed and now we find ourselves in a fallen world. A world where exits both good AND evil.
Jesus reminds us that Satan is “the prince of this world” (John 12:31), Paul refers to Satan as “the god of this world, who hath blinded the minds of them which believe not, lest the glorious gospel of Christ, who is the image of God, should shine to them.” (2 Corinthians 4:4) and “the prince of the power of the air, the spirit that now worketh in the children of disobedience” (Ephesians 2:2) John makes a further distinction when he says: “We know that we are of God, and the whole world lieth in wickedness” (1 John 5:19).
Thank God He did not leave us without instruction on how to deal with this world where people have access to evil and the means to manifest it in all its gruesomeness. He gave us a manual. The Bible**! First He gave direction through His prophets in the old testament. They needed to follow strict laws and perform rituals to cleanse themselves from unrighteousness in order to receive from a Holy God. You must understand, what is Holy (sacred, blessed, pure, light, loving and righteous) keeps what is unholy far from it or else it would no longer be “Holy”. But in order for all of us to be able to reconnect to him despite our “unholiness”, He provided salvation for all who dwell on the earth, the sacrifice of Himself, of his only begotten son, to cover the sins of the world, so that all who choose Him could be redeemed by His righteousness. Only then can we receive His life giving Holy Spirit, to stay and make His home within us until the end.
What does that mean? It means each of us can be led into all truth directly by God through His holy Spirit. When we pray, read the Bible and consciously seek to connect with our one creator God on His terms. For me personally this choice and journey meant I received of His peace. He changed my person. My heart has literally changed from where I preferred to stay in house on my couch to where I now love to connect with people. From where I encountered and recognized divine intervention once every few years, to where it has become my daily bread! The overwhelming peace, joy and calmness I experience even when things around me may seem to fall apart is the strongest witness for me that the Lord is guiding my every step day by day perfecting my knowledge of Him. Tweeking my understanding, my discernment through failures and victories. It is a journey and I love it.
And so it is, that once we turn back to God and ask His forgiveness for our shortcomings and wrong doing and for the years where we put Him last on our priority list or where He was not listed at all, and we thank Him for His great love for us as shown by the greatest sacrifice of His own son Jesus Christ, that He will redeem us and give us life abundantly.
**I will not enter into a long discussion on the preservation of text and different versions of the Bible. If you wish to find God’s truth, the King James Version will help you a long way! And with the help of biblical scolars and messianic Jews who know about the culture and the rituals that the Bible refers to much will become more clear. I found some excellent teachers that reveal many mysteries hidden within scripture which I will list in the media section.
Whatever you may think of this blog, this site or of others proclaiming the Good News, if you are hungry for God, please turn back to Him and ask God to reveal to you His truth.
I will relay what I have come to find in all honesty and I love sharing as I love what God has done for me and wish it on the world! But He will answer your call and open your ears and eyes for His truth. The Bible holds such beautiful truth if only it were read. Earnestly ask God to guide you in your search and He will bring it all together. Beware of Ego and be willing to park it on one side for a while, preferably permanently but that comes with the walk.
I was brought up in the understanding that God exists, and that the Bible holds important wisdom for life. My father would read to us, his kids, from the Bible on feast days. Then from a practical viewpoint, I was encouraged to establish myself in life first (education, work, family) and then seek God and His wisdom. I’ve come to realise however, that by the time one has these things up and running, there hardly is any time left to consider the things of our Heavenly Father. Many around me consider themselves kings of their own kingdom, and think they have no need of God. The greatest misconception! If you like having the wind in your back, you need to detect and accept its direction. If you like to know where it leads to, you must consider the source. So to know God is Good is the first step, and to let Him lead is the second.
I have found that He leads me in a loving and righteous way into His truth. Setting me straight and comforting me to deal with any change. He gives me life abundantly. Not necessarily an abundant life (yachts, cars and castles) but receiving of His life giving power, His “living water” abundantly. I have never felt so alive! Walking in the peace of God no matter what comes my way and being effective in loving others and showing by example the freedom of temptation and being right with God.
So, go for it! Take a leap of faith!
“But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” Matthew 6:33*
* Note: picking a scripture verse here and there has led skewed and faulty doctrine. Please read 10 verses before and after each verse before interpreting any verse by its own. I do my best to take verses in context, but again encourage all to read the entire chapter in the bible whenever reference is made.
Sitting on the couch, feeling frustrated. I feel like I’m unable to walk in the Spirit and no longer confident to do the Word by myself. I’ve been obsessively trying to find out everything there is to know about God, Jesus and the spiritual reality around us. Finding many treasures and keys during my search but essentially casting them to one side as they did not satiate my hunger to know more, to understand. Not realising that these keys need to be digested. Meditated upon. I gulped them in search of the next.
Speaking with a friend of mine, whom I was honoured to baptise a few weeks ago, she asked me if I ever considered becoming a preacher. Yes I would love to use all my time to study the scripture, preach the Gospel and demonstrate the Spirit. We continued talking and I shared relevant scripture passages with her. I was at the time already overtired. I was diligently seeking the right words to help her, at the same time I did not want to burden her with some of the things I had learned. I had been researching a lot about madness in people and demons and how they manifest. I had encountered an individual who was clearly in severe bondage of a demonic nature. I prayed for the person but felt inadequate at doing so, and I felt the need to be better prepared in case it would needed again in the future. Therefore I had been reading up on peoples experiences. Really focusing on understanding the works of Satan in and through individuals, how his bondage and oppression comes to being and more importantly how it is broken. The research left me feeling burdened and it had sucked the joy out of me. It made me lose hope for some people.
My friend noticed I wasn’t my usual self, and asked me sternly if I was happy. She said she notices my eyes flashing back and forth and said It looked like my eyes were showing signs of madness themselves! And she was right. I had exerted myself. Too much too fast. I was struggling to tie it all together. Information overload and over-tiredness seemed to be getting the better of me. Not good. I agreed I needed to rest and let things rest for a few days.
For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7
Honestly it shook me a little. I felt my ego wanting to get into the defensive. But I knew she was right. In fact I had been getting hints to let it all rest but I made excuses to continue researching. I no longer was learning for the better, but more and more looked like a morbid obsession. It literaly gripped me.
Thank God for my friend. I know I would have stepped back into the positive sooner or later, but I’m glad this meeting set me back on track sooner and NOT later. So I recalled that indeed God gave me a sound mind. I needed to take control over my interests. God want us to be strong in body mind amd spirit. And so I thought I’s better focus on the body and the mind a bit more now. So I started to work out, eat properly and read a little less. Nevertheless, while I’m writing this I’m still sitting on that couch and I feel like I’m failing…
I just cried out to the Lord, why am I messing it all up? I wasn’t able to continue doing more research. I just sat quietly on this couch. Interestingly I know all will be fine, but I still feel so shitty that eventhough I truly trust I will be fine for God, I’m pissed off at myself for still messing it all up these past few weeks.
I visualised myself sifting through many pages and documents which partly disintegrated and flew about as I ravaged through them. And after some silence it was revealed unto me that I was disrespecting all the little pearls of truth that had been given to me during my research, during my search for truth. Not taking the time to meditate on them, and give some time for them to become ingrained in my memory and soul. I was acting out the role of the “swine” before which were thrown beautiful pearls and I was trampling over them trying to find the end all truth and knowledge, the bigger picture. And of course this is in fact only known by God the Father Himself. Wow what revelation. In other words, take it easy! Relax! Do what you can in the time and opportunity given to you and if it works out great, if it doesn’t learn from it, dust yourself off and continue in good spirit!
Come to Me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light. Matthew 11: 28-30
And with that came the insight that I need to sit down and post more blogs. I need to write about my experiences and the revelations given to me to help me digest it all! And if you enjoy reading, great! and if it helps you out, even better! For me it is cathartic!
So in essence I started to follow my own will, or at least what I thought I needed. Instead of seeking my lessons from God through experience. I have enough head knowledge as it is. it’s walking in the faith that build the spirit. and who could be a better teacher than the Holy Spirit. He is our portion deliverer! I love it, thank you Lord!
Better a patient person than a warrior,
one with self-control than one who takes a city. Proverbs 16:32
The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9
Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Colossians 3:12
But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life.